I Need This (2012-08-24)

I need this, what the Hell do I need? Well first I need this song on repeat by Jessie J it is an amazing song I love every little thing about this song and the lyrics. This is part 2 of my 2 part thought process, the first was angry this is not so much it is a great and I love the meaning behind it.

“Stop! Where am I? Shock! I can’t cry, Pop! I need some space, No! This isn’t me Go! Please let me breath I’ll be back sooner then you know.”

“I Need This Space just like you need air; I need this time, time to clear out my mind. Wait did you hear that, hear my heartbeat I really need this”

“No its not personal sorry if I’m hurting you please don’t give up on me now. I needed this time alone to know I could come back home to breath.”

I love the song in its entirety it is amazing and it so resonates in me in so many different ways. Well first I think one of the main issues in personal relationships both friendly and romantic neither party really walks in the others shoes nor do they completely grasp the person they love is acting a certain way or being out of what they are used to. I have this quote and it talks about loving to see his tailor because he is the only person that doesn’t try to fit him in a previous version of himself and refits him every time they see each other. That quote makes me smile because in recent months I have fell to those judgments; time has passed I haven’t seen people in a while and it feels like the time that passed has really passed. And others that it’s been 2 years or the few its been more then 5 or just random moments it feels like time stopped and we pick up where the last joke was told or the last memory we had together and fill in the gaps.  But I guess growing up means growing apart or growing closer whether it be friend or lover I love this song and the title because I needed the time I took away from Vegas, just like I needed the time away from Dancing this Summer just like I need this new path I am on. I feel like in the song she realizes for this relationship to work she needs time and space to figure through the highs and lows in what she is embarking on. You have to be open to know that people change, grow, evolve not all at the same pace and not all in the same way but that is where the old saying I use “Life is Sum of Choice you Make” comes into play. It’s up to you to choose if you wanna stick it out and be there while someone that’s hurt you or you haven’t seen a lot of or just someone that you have grown apart from deals with the same things you are but in their way. With the hurt do you need this time to figure out is it worth it or is my resentment going to be here forever.  With the one you haven’t seen a lot of do you take the road of let’s do lunch and catch up on our life’s since we last were around each other. And with the Distance and growing apart to you try to mend that bridge with active trying daily to find the source of the Chasm or do you let it go and chalk it up to Life moving rapidly forward?

The Second is the awakening when you realize WOW life is happening, in the beginning of the song she is so ready to get that time to figure her out and find what she thinks she is missing and along the way hoping he sticks around to see the woman she’s becoming. I know that both are hard roles to be in but what do you do when on her hand you feel as if no matter what happens he may leave because I put this man through hell for a while and now he’s done. I wanna be better version of me not just for me or him but us and everything I do isn’t good enough? Or on his end given so much of him to this cause this love that is so Amazing in his eyes because he sees forever in her eyes and then to be put in this place where she needs space now and she is pushing you away so you think, so you close off and get angry. Like I said I have been in both positions and it sucks for both but who knows if either will work or will be what both you and the other person need to be that Happily Ever After?

I guess the goal for me is Happiness and in that comes with friends that build you up not just suck the life out of you and out of a room. Real friends that you know if you invited your entire friend base over there would be no drama because all of them would be an extension of you therefore they would all pretty much feel as if they know each other. A woman who loves me flaws and all and we have been through life together I have seen her fall and crawl and fight and climb and grow, believe, change, evolve, love more than she ever has and build something more than just bad memories together, a woman who I see forever in her eyes and I daily fall back in love with her because of her smile. A family that gets me and is supportive but that has always been the case I have been blessed and, in that the ones that is more than just best friends or friends the family outside my family that Ride to Hell with me and pull me back when I get to comfortable there. I am seeing those aspects more and more as I get older and life happens to me and it makes me so happy and freaks me out LOL.

I will finish with I NEED THIS moment in my life and I love this moment in my life. I wanna thank EVERYONE I mean the Lighthouse in my life who has dealt with the best and worst versions of me and still wanna see it through till the end, the friends that have come and stayed and I couldn’t forget if I wanted to cause they are lifers, the family that is Irreplaceable for all the best reasons. Then to the ones that ran away the ones that left a bad taste in my mouth, the users, and abuser, the Misery Loves Company Members thank you the most without all of them and some of you reading this I would not have been able to see and now have this Amazing Army in my corner not just my One & Only but A Force of Nature an AMAZING  Group of people that I can call at a moment’s notice to defend the ground in which cannot be shaken by Negativity or Jealousy or Spite.

Look to the Skies because my Light doesn’t stay Dim Long, gravity and me were never friends!!!

Live, Love, Laugh, Dance,

-I See You…-

*Life is the Sum of Choices you Make*

Ty 2012

Wide Awake (2012 -08-22)

I thought about 2 different blogs so that’s what I will do this month because of recent events I think it is cause for 2 different ones. This one is the not so nice one, so if by the end you feel like I was talking about you or that it was a personal attack STOP TALKING TO ME, LET ME GO, LEAVE ME ALONE AND KEEP YOUR MISERY TO YOURSELF. The old saying is so true Misery Loves Company for so many damn reasons “side note this has nothing to do with my personal relationship but mostly the so called friends I have made & well enemies”. In recent weeks, months, years I have started to see the dark caves in human race and glanced at them in different lights and it has been to say the least scary, enlightening, and fulfilling. Everyone has a twinge of Jealousy in them as well as a hint of Revenge or a lot of both depending on the individual and how they deal with their personal demons. And in that respect blossomed this concept behind the post your reading, we all love this song from Katy Perry and the lyrics are amazing no need to get into them if you don’t know the song or the lyrics look them up you will love them.

            I have learned to take people with a grain of salt and to that extent either they grow or they hang themselves weather its 5 weeks, months, or years in the end no one can keep their true colors hidden for too long. Like most secrets they come to the light at some point and at that same point people can only hind their true face for so long before Medusa comes out. I’m an open book and I have said that for quite a long time and nothing has changed if you wanna know something just ask and if you’re too chicken shit to ask read my blogs they have all of me to read. Here is the thing I don’t name names or give specific situations cause I care about other people’s privacy mine on the other hand is non-existent. If we are no longer friends or as a co-worker you just made me sick, the relationship ended or “I” have moved on you should too it’s not that hard stop following my Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, stop requesting my friends to get at me somehow LET IT GO you have fallen from cloud 9. I no longer care who you are what you do and how you are, you life becomes a distant memory so I advise the following DO THE SAME. Life is too short to hold grudges or HATE cause your grass is dying mine isn’t greener I just switched to turf or gravel so stop trying to keep up and be messy cause karma as we all know is an Evil Bitch “That’s B I C T H in that order” LOL sorry  had to. I guess more than mad I am just disappointed in Homo-Sapiens in general; don’t cheat on your boyfriend of 3 years and then get mad at me cause things are weird, don’t sleep around on your husband and expect me understand, please don’t think months, years after we break up that I am stunting you and please know that just cause your blood I Give cause family the first ones to screw you or not support you. Co-workers, friends, exes, and family kill me when they start ruining there life I am the escape goat NO Ma’am.

I love learning lessons and I love the growth that comes after the lesson has changed me. You learn by Listening and Living and in that order I don’t know everything and I still fall down quite a bit but like the awesome new Batman movies “why do we fall Mr. Wayne?” Its true so here is my quick rant and then I hope I don’t have to show my Ass cause very rarely do I go Dark and Alley Cat Crazy but when you try to compromise my real friends or intentionally hurt me or my feeling it’s a necessary evil and let the Record show there is someone in this world crazier then you and I probably know them . . “Yeah, I was in the dark I was falling hard with an open heart. I'm wide awake, how did I read the stars so wrong.” That line in the song is my Kryptonite I just assume people have good intentions and when you grow apart or life happens I just think okay LIFE goes on. Not true for some and to those some I welcome your anger, hate, resentment, hurt feeling but I just ask that you address me my email address is danzetim@gmail.com feel free to contact me set up a call or just send hate mail it makes my life that much more enjoyable.  Life is too damn short to be bitter or hold that kind of anger in you LET GO and live people die every damn min stop wasting your time on little old me if you LOVE me then LOVE me, if not MOVE ON. I wish you Ocean breezes and everything you need to be Happy in this Life cause if I catch you in the next run for cover J J J

In closing please for the sake of you living a little longer cause you’re not stroking out at life I have my happiness and change and growth, grow up, move on and LIVE YOUR LIFE you only get 1 don’t waste it on Jealousy, Envy, Resentment, Anger, and Child's Play we grown so get you grown homo-sapiens pants out and LIVE…

-I See You…-

*Life is the Sum of Choices you Make*

Live, Love, Laugh

Ty 2012

Hurts the Most (2012-07-14)

Hurts The Most

                I know what most people are saying I love that Rascal Flatts song or who the hell is Rascal Flatts? And it would be the mixer of both cause I personally love Rascal Flatts song but it’s not that, it’s a song I heard years ago when I was graduating High School and moving to Orlando. But then it got on my download list that I lost 3 laptops ago because she did her thang at the B.E.T. awards with Brandy and it was Monica in which made me re-listen songs I loved back then and this “After Storm” album track was one of them. I didn’t feel the song this way almost ten yrears ago I thought this would be cool to do a lyrical hipish dance or combo to then, Wow now I am thinking did I just go through this. In fact you look and go did my BFF go through this last year or”is she still fighting that battle?”, or “am I really going through this again?”, “was it worth it?”, “Is this me right now?”

                It for me was all those at once plus some but, Download the song or I will share a link to one of the youtube+lyrics videos at the end. that is what was scary cause I understand and was in it full force. It sounds to me in the song Monica screwed up, waited to long to commit, made a grown lady boo boo, and was getting to finally tell him. I don’t know if Monica felt this way when she was performing or helped with making it. But I was there I was that guy she left or I was that friend that I just heard this situation or remember your god sisters tell you what not to miss out on. I know most my blogs are kind of emotional but it is like my brother and some friends said when I just took some time from dance to visit the family for more then 4 days (I know Seriously) they called a Hopeless Romantic I remember my big brother joking about it with some of our friends at the house during a BBQ. You know I love a good BBQ, either I am cooking and everyone brings drinks and desert or its my MOM doing the same.

 I know I am a hopeless romantic everyone who truly knows me will go oh hell without question he is. I felt bad for the lyrics of the situation in this song. A part of me went damn she had a good one and let it slip because of some insecurities or taking too much time to realize he was it. While the other part was saying “I’m walking away and like Lisa’s character in *Single Ladies* said at the end of Episode 6 of Season 2 “If we never speak again in life, it will be too soon for me” DAMN. Real talk I need some words this time, cause usually I will talk about choices you make and things you can do to maybe learn grow or put some meaning to it. but I know I am interested in some outside thoughts and hey when all these get published I would Love to put some responses in it so go follow me on twitter and F.B @tydanze  look me up on intagram @tylamar follow my blog tylamar.blogspot.com tell a friend I wanna know where the world is now…
Here is the link to Monica's song w/ Lyrics http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpTmvIGXMOY

I Hope to hear from everyone soon and my next will be coming down the pipe soon.

Live, Love & Dance (A little),

Ty 2012

– I See You…-

 *Life is the Sum of Choices you Make*

youtube.com/danzetim

facebook.com/tydanze

twitter.com/tydanze

Give your Heart A Break (2012-06-18)

Give your Heart a Break

Demi Lovato newest single it upsets me for many reasons but I will get into that soon enough. First let me say I do love this song too much and I must think my girl Amanda for putting me on it. 

“Don't wanna break your heart, Wanna give your heart a break
I know you're scared it's wrong Like you might make a mistake.
There's just one life to live, And there's no time to wait, to waste
So let me give your heart a break.”

 

This had me dancing like just wanted to break out some chorey. Listen to it and realize you can relate; either you are her feeling like you just want this person to relax and love or the other hand the one that is so over heartaches you can’t see what’s right in front of you. I think for me I purposing jump in that first role I don’t wanna break your heart I just wanna give your heart a break, that’s amazing I just want your heart to go on vacation with me. Less drama, some smiles, warmth, protection, love comfort those are some of the things I want your heart to do when it take a break. But in this process do you get so far from you in trying to give someones heart a break that you end up breaking yours? How do you know when you need to give your heart a break and not worry about someone elses? It is and can be exhausting proving over and over that you aren’t the norm. It must be harder for my ladies because if you meet a man fucked by life I am so sorry in advance because it like taking down the wall of China with a toothpick. I find it easier for us because someone can only fake being a nice guy for so long and then his true colors come out so ladies wait it out if he wrong for you he will get on some BS. Here is some more of the track the feed this second helping in 1 day WOW. 

“The day I first met you, you told me you'd never fall in love. But now that I get you
I know fear is what it really was. Now there we are So close yet so far. Haven't I passed the test When will you realize Baby, I'm not like the rest.”

It is like the best part is that last line When will you realize baby I am not like the rest.  How long has that battle been going on with relationships I am not him or she isn’t me. I love to hate that concept but it is one I struggle with so I understand the drive to wanna prove them wrong that not all of us cheat or hit or manipulate or aint worth a pot to piss in. But I also see the drain factor in building someone up you could be tearing you down. And in closing these lyrics and this thought…

“Cause you've been hurt before I can see it in your eyes You try to smile it away, some things you can't disguise
Don't wanna break your heart Maybe, I can ease the ache, the acheSo let me give your heart a break. There's just so much you can take, Give your heart a break.”

I Love it I will finish with this concept you have been hurt before we all have I am here trying to make it work. You try to smile away things you can’t disguise, pretend things are ok when ya’ll should all know if someone knows you and loves you they know when shit ain’t right. Maybe I ease the ache, Let me make it a little bit easier for you to live in this world and hopefully with. There is just so much you can take, I think that is a two way street. One can only take being not loved or underappreciated for so long. And one can only feel less about themselves until they take out themselves if not both parties out. So I guess play the song and take what you will but hear the desire to be more then we are in relationships nowadays. Settling or not uplifting and realize one persons trash is another person’s treasure before its too late…

-I See You…- *Life is the Sum of Choices you Make* J Ty 2012

Payphone (2012-0-18)

Payphone  

Come on if this song isn’t on your playlist you missing out. Maroon 5 newest summers 2012 single feat Wiz Khalifa. Great break up song or for that matter a song on enlighten thinking for the less jaded people of this world LOL. Here is some words for thought.

“I'm at a payphone trying to call home. All of my change i've spent on you
Where are the times gone babyIt's all wrong, we're at  the place we made for two.

If happy ever after did existI would still be holding you like this
And all those fairytales are full of Shit. One more Fuckin love song i'll be sick. “

Genius it hit him like a ton of bricks “All my change I spent on you.” Dumbass he probably called himself, they made plans and now he the fool. I love the line about fairy tales so funny and yet so true. If fairy tales exist you wouldn’t be across the country or the world or engaged or so damn crazy. But I just realized fairy tales are full of shit. They might both cheat one or both are going to get good at lying and manipulating the other. For lack of better words Shits going to get Real. How do you deal with that feeling that times up, too many wrongs, or just not enough right, Maybe its just to night and day concept or the You see the world in a Million Colors they only see black & white. Either way that must be some hard pills to swallow. I guess it comes down to he is done no redemption he tried which is rare.

“You turned your back on tomorrow Cause you forgot yesterday I gave you my love to borrow But just gave it away. You can't expect me to be a friend I don't expect you to care I know I said it before
But all of our bridges burnt down.
I've wasted my nights You turned out the lights Now i'm paralyzed. Still stucked in that time when we called it love But even the sun sets in paradise.”

Come the hell on if no one feels this come take a nap. He is emotional and hitting all the nails on the coffin. He tried everything and it still wasn’t enough, I know so many of us who do that exact thing. Hold on to relationships till there is seriously nothing but hate and pain before you let go and realize you wasted so much change on it. The best part of this is for me that last line “Even the Sun sets on Paradise”, it is so true and no one believes in bumps anymore. I guess it is something we all should have; notice I said should, because we all don’t have that and in that respect its kind of sad. We cant be friends we wont be friends you hurt me and that wont change I feel like I wasted so much of my life being what you wanted and that wont go away. So Deuces…

I guess this song struck a cord because and some point I have hit that bottom of anger and that upside to anger. Which if you know me and been around me I love that line in the tub. I feel this song and where it takes you and what you feel after it, it keeps me thinking the decisions I make has to be better. No one wants to feel less because someone didn’t delivery there end of the agreement to love, care, cherish, support, uplift, encourage. Without a ring those things are still in a committed relationship between 2 adults. It should just be without conversation or questioning those things that should be daily. I hate Valentine’s Day but I also love it, don’t tell me when to love her I show her daily I don’t need one day. And on the other hand I want someone to wanna do something special for me because I make them happy. I see the payphone concept on such a wide scale I am at a payphone (Some random part in your life) trying to find my way home, realizing I spent so much of me on you. Obama made a great quote and I so love it “Be the Change you Want to See in the World”… So True Live, Love & Dance

-I See You…-   *Life is the Sum of Choices you Make* <3 Ty 2012

In 3D (06-13-2012)

In 3D

          Well with the world going full force in the digital age i think it wasn’t long before someone did a song with this in the title, the only difference is this song that I got this from is about something so much more. It is a beautiful song of Monica’s latest album “New Life”. I will put you up on the lyrics I will spill out my train of thought.

Verse-“I kinda feel like time is passing us by, But its killing me to leave you 'lone, Cry all day long.
Baby I'm so sure that we belong. Look in my eyes, they never lie.”
Climb-“I see it so clear right now, I'm riding shotgun, we're headed there. If I should disappear right now, you wouldn't notice it or care. Not at all.”
Chorus-“Baby you don't see nothing, You must be blind, out your mind, out your something.
I see us so clearly, it's like 20/20. I see us in love, like the people on TV.
I see us in 3D.... I see us in 3D.I see us together, it looks like forever.
I see us in love, now don't it look better? In 3D

You already know I fell in love with this song like I mean I was like OK Monica you did on ya thang on this track. Like the first verse and the climb it is sick for me I get it when you’re in a friendship or relationship mostly a relationship that is kind of stuck in a not so comfortable place and you see something they probably don’t or can’t. Maybe he/she doesn’t have the capacity to see this amazing person they have, or he/she can’t step to the plate and make that next big commitment, hell he/she keeps bullshitting and you getting over it. You kind of realize “If I disappeared right now who would notice or care”. You go into defense mode or start to settle for this is it because you see the chorus and they can’t “Baby you don’t see nothing you must be blind, out your mind, out your something. I see us so clearly its like 20/20, I see us in love like the people on TV I see us in 3D.” I Love all that, when do you think you sit someone down and say here is the thing I need more I see more? And I can’t keep wasting my life. Maybe you want kids, or finally be a wife and mother, or hell maybe you just want to give someone keys to your house, or for that matter just be able to say we are together. It’s those steps in relationships that some people are blind too they don’t see what you see and you hear your friends or see that things are working but, you don’t know what’s behind closed doors; that is the exciting part that’s what you want to experience and the amazing vacations together the laughing, movie dates, kids first step, your honeymoon, your first house. I love talking to my friends and hearing that I don’t feel alone in the pursuit of happiness or lack thereof because the more you look the more it eludes you. I love hearing that my friends are a lot like me “he don’t see I want kids, he can’t tell I wanna get married, why won’t she see I’m a great guy, is it so hard for her to know accept my flaws.” It those things we struggle with. Is it going to still work even though I know he or she won’t change or wanna grow in the same direction until I have some version of “THE TALK”. You know maybe it’s the “I need more sexually”, or the “Are we serious”, the “Is marriage even a possibility” there are plenty depending on your situation but that  is what is so amazing about life in today’s way of life. You can say “listen give us a chance see what I see.” This leads me to the next part of the song I love.

“Baby I can see us from a mile away (Cause love is right in front of my face)
And its so close I can touch it. Oh baby give us a chance, See what I see.”

Is this your last ditch effort to say listen last straw. I you just love music cause I put myself in those persons shoes looking at that person saying Baby give us a chance see what I see. And then you are fed up you are losing love and faith and you look elsewhere hell maybe you become more distant, or maybe you substitute it with drugs, or cigarettes, or alcohol, or god forbid you find it in someone elses arms or emotional connection. You got to go for what makes you happy. I love my Best Friend Amanda for so much but to definitely put me up on the quote from the movie “This Means War” and the funny lady Chelsea Lately says towards the end.            “Don't choose the better man, choose the man who makes you a better woman.” And that is so true I love that and that maybe the person you are seeing now and that’s amazing. Or you have to be adult to enough and grounded enough to know not to waste this precious time on Earth on someone that doesn’t deserve you and is keeping you from true happiness. I love Both the realization he/she is the person you want to spend your life with  or the shocking truth that’s is not meant to be.

I guess in closing I love this concept this song and the thought process it gave me for my future with my career, love, and the present me and future me. It is amazing to be alive in this time in our world’s history I see so much for the coming months and years and that is a Great feeling. Find your *LIGHTHOUSE*. That person that holds you up, see in your darkest hours, your safe house, a place that you know is HOME. Live you only get one chance at life so live it fully.

Life is the Sum of Choices you Make* <3 Ty 2012 –I See You…- J